How Do Men Use a Dildo?
A complete guide to dildos for men — anal use, prostate stimulation, choosing the right toy and using it safely for a comfortable first experience.
Shop DildosAny person of any gender can use a dildo. For men, the primary use is anal penetration and prostate stimulation. The prostate gland — sometimes called the P-spot — is located approximately 5 to 7 centimetres inside the anal canal toward the belly. Stimulation of the prostate can produce intense, whole-body orgasms and is entirely safe when approached correctly.
Why Men Use Dildos
The most common reason men use dildos is anal stimulation and prostate massage. The prostate is a walnut-sized gland that surrounds the urethra and can be accessed through the anal canal. It contains a high density of nerve endings and, when stimulated, can produce sensations significantly different from — and for many men more intense than — penile stimulation alone.
Men also use dildos as part of pegging — being penetrated by a partner wearing a strap-on harness — and as part of solo exploration regardless of sexual orientation. Using a dildo for anal play has no bearing on a person's sexuality. It is simply a form of physical pleasure available to anyone with a prostate.
Choosing the Right Dildo
For prostate stimulation, a curved dildo is significantly more effective than a straight one. The curve allows the tip to be directed upward toward the front wall of the anal canal where the prostate sits. Look for a toy with a noticeable upward curve and a moderate size for a first experience.
For anal use, the dildo must have a flared base. This is a safety requirement — without a wide base, a toy can be drawn fully inside the body and require medical removal. All toys designed for anal use should have a base wider than the insertable shaft.
Silicone is the best material for beginners — soft, non-porous, body-safe and easy to clean. Start with a slim diameter under 1.5 inches for a first experience.
How to Find the Prostate
The prostate gland is located on the front wall of the anal canal, approximately 5 to 7 centimetres inside (roughly 2 to 3 inches). When using a curved dildo anally, angle the tip upward toward the belly as you insert. At the right depth you may feel a slightly firmer area of tissue — this is the prostate. Gentle rocking pressure or small circular motions on this area produces prostate stimulation. Some men find the sensation overwhelming at first; this is normal. Start with very light pressure and build gradually.
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Shop NowStep-by-Step Guide for First Use
Step 1. Choose a curved silicone dildo with a flared base and a slim diameter. Clean with unscented soap and warm water before use.
Step 2. Get comfortable and relaxed. Lie on your back with knees drawn up, or on your side in the foetal position — whichever feels most natural.
Step 3. Apply water-based lubricant generously to both the toy and the anal opening. More is always better for anal play.
Step 4. Begin with external stimulation around the anal area. Breathe slowly and allow the muscles to relax naturally before any insertion.
Step 5. Insert very slowly beginning with just the tip. Pause at each stage and breathe. Allow the sphincter to relax around the toy before going deeper.
Step 6. At approximately 5 to 7 centimetres depth, angle the tip upward toward the belly. Apply gentle rocking or circular pressure to find the prostate. You will know when you find it.
What Is Pegging?
Pegging is the term for a partner penetrating a man anally using a strap-on dildo. It has become significantly more mainstream in recent years as awareness of male anal pleasure has grown. The same principles apply as all anal dildo use — appropriate size, abundant lubrication and clear communication with your partner. For harness and dildo guidance see our page on how to use a strap on dildo.